Back in 8th grade, someone introduced deadlegging (alternatively known as giving someone a charlie horse) into the social sphere. You just throw your knee into the side of someone's leg (generally with a lot of force, because dumbass kids don't know about restraint [or at least I didn't]), resulting in a great amount of pain. I also think the only way you ever found out about it was through firsthand experience. Nobody ever walked around telling others what a deadleg/charlie horse was; kids just walked around giving 'em out like it was Christmas and they were some kind of Santa whose only gift is pain.
I don't remember specifically how it happened to me, but it's not like there were a great variety of ways people went around kneeing someone in the leg. I was probably just standing around at break and was caught unawares by a friend who thought it was time to initiate me. It was probably painful - it pretty much has to be, unless you happen to stand around in a suit of armor (which... I didn't). So, there you have it. I'm standing around probably just talking to my friends when someone comes up and knees me in the side of my leg. It hurts a lot and my leg aches, so of course I clutch my leg. If it helps, you can imagine the scene with Peter Griffin where he sits there on the sidewalk clutching his leg as he hisses in pain.
So anyways, some idiot thought it was a good idea to do that to me, like I really wasn't capable of going waaayyy overboard with it. Can you guess what my first thought was, after the pain subsided? "I gotta show this to someone!" (What a vicious goddamn cycle it would be, if everyone who had pain inflicted on them made the executive decision to subsequently inflict the pain on someone else). Of course, the first people you wanna show some cool shit to is your friends, and I immediately knew I had to go to Alan with this.
Alan's name doesn't have to be changed because this might not even be an incident of bullying (because I didn't go out with the express intention to whoop his ass or anything - doesn't bullying have to have some malicious intent behind it??). Furthermore, he's one of my all time very best friends anyways, so I've already recounted this story (with and without his presence) a buncha times. So to make it very clear who I am talking about, I am referring to Alan Chen. The one who, as a SIXTH GRADER, already grew more facial hair than I am able to more than a decade later. The one who currently studies Structural Engineering at UCSD. THAT Alan Chen.
So anyways, I now have it in my head that I've gotta share this with Alan. I know where he hangs out at lunch, so it's easy enough. I think I even waited midway through lunch to let him think that he wasn't gonna see me. Don't forget: to do this thing right, you've gotta have a great element of surprise. So I let the time pass, hangin' out or whatever 'til I decide it's time. I stake out the area he's hanging out in, between Ms. Mah's class and the locker room. I make sure his back is turned, so that my approach goes unnoticed. I slowly walk up to him, gesturing to whoever he's talking to to remain quiet, lest they tip him off. By the time I close to within ~10 feet, I start to smile in glee at my imminent success. And as I draw closer, I start to speed up - probably a combination of excitement and nerves. Whatever the case, the resulting momentum ensures that I'll be able to give him a good, hard knee. Which is exactly what I did.
Don't get me wrong now - I didn't run up to the guy and soar through the air to deliver a flying kick or some shit like that. I just went at a quick pace to his side, cocked my leg back, and really let fly with pretty much all my strength. Just like I said, I went waaaayy overboard with it. To add insult to injury, I probably even shouted "Dead leg!" as I did it, like it was entirely appropriate to shout out whatever you inflict on someone. (Could you imagine? "AIDS!" "Bitch slap!" Hahahah)
Anyways, after my swift knee to the leg, he just... crumpled. As in, his leg gave out from under him and he pretty much folded to the ground. I immediately knew I'd gone too far. He shouted something like "What the fuck was that?!" (I guess he didn't listen to my obnoxious shout, lol).
I helped him up (or maybe I tried and he refused 'cause he was pissed. That's probably what happened), and fortunately he wasn't actually injured. He definitely had a limp for more than a few seconds though, and I'm pretty sure his leg ached for awhile.
I titled this making it look like an incident of bullying because when I first thought about it, it seemed pretty damn mean. It still does, but after taking into account the fact that I was just being a dumbass kid, I'm not so sure it fits into anyone's idea of bullying (you can even ask Alan. Just because I hurt him didn't mean I really MEANT it, y'know?). It's still funny to me because I can't really fathom what was going on in my head at the time. Why did I think it was a good idea to knee my best friend and not my worst enemy? And why on earth didn't I give any consideration to restraint?? Some questions will never go answered, I guess...
