How to: Engage With a Racist/Misogynist/Homophobe

     Something I've noticed with the polarizing effect of the Presidency and politics is a prevalence of people disconnecting from others when there are disagreements. Things like "If you think x is okay, I don't wanna be friends" - you know what I'm referring to. Instances of this that I've seen on my feed or heard about in person have gone like this:

• "I don't have the energy to educate you about insert topic here, bye Felicia"
• "Since the election, people have really shown their true colors and made it easy to unfriend/unfollow"
• "We found out Bob doesn't like lesbians, so we don't hang out with him anymore."

     I don't really get that, though. If you react in any of those ways, you recognize that there is something you want to change. Whether it's because of your tiredness or frustration, you just give up. So you've turned any possibility of change to 0%. 

     Not only that, but I think there's a serious lack of perspective when you want to quit. You gotta remember - first impressions and long-held beliefs are tough nuts to crack, and nearly impossible if you engage in some form of argument. I'm pretty certain hostility and confrontation causes us to hold even tighter onto our beliefs. So what's the appropriate way to engage?

     Sounds boring, but I think the answer is pretty simple. Eat, drink, shoot the breeze. Be open and understanding. Listen to another perspective. Over time, they'll come around - but not without nudging. Quitting on someone, though*? That's definitely not the way - you've either robbed someone of your perspective or successfully gave that person reason to dismiss your position.

     If you think it is an unwarranted burden** that you must be the one to explain, or coax, or whatever - I hate to say it, but you could be complicit in the perpetuation of whatever issue it is you want to support. In the words of Dr. King, only love can drive out hate. Not shouting down ignorant folks, or pushing them away. Love.

If you don't think this is a very good idea, I think this (short) article would be a great read for you: Guy befriends and converts 200+ Klansmen

*Don't get me wrong - I know there are plenty of folks who are absolutely intractable. You can sort out the people to invest your time in, I'm sure.

**Also, burdensome as it may feel, we are always representative of the groups we are a part of. You might not like it, but it's a fact that you have contributed, in ways big and small, to thousands of others' ideas of what it's like to be you, whether you're gay/straight, yellow/white/black/brown, etc. etc. So wear it proudly and represent your groups well. 

The Wall

     With the government shutdown about to hit the 3-week mark & with no end in sight (combined with the fact that I haven't written in awhile), I thought I'd write some about it. I think most folks get the gist of it, but I'll go over the main points anyways:

• While campaigning for the presidency, one of Donald Trump's main selling points was to build a wall along the country's southern border. (Speaking of main selling points, whatever happened to "Lock her up"?) Anyways, not only would this wall prevent all sorts of bad characters from making their way in, but Mexico would pay for it! Not 10%, or 20%, or even 50%. They would pay for all of it.
• Almost 2 years from his inauguration, the wall hasn't been built (and Hillary hasn't been locked up either, now that I think about it ... hmmm.) and Mexico won't pay for it. Since Mexico won't pay for the wall, but we need to have a wall, then we will pay for the wall. Every single dollar of the $5,700,000,000 that he is requesting. & if you're the type to believe in government inefficiency/cronyism, then you just know that price tag does not match what could eventually be spent on it (God forbid).

     While most of the country sits around wondering when the government will get it together and resume business (without paying for said wall), there are still plenty (as in millions) of Americans who clamor for the wall. In fact, there are over 3 million signatures collected here "LETTING POLITICIANS KNOW YOU WANT THE WALL." So, y'know, there's that. Oh, & about 335,000 people willing to shell out, on average, $60 (collectively, they've raised $20,000,000. Just $5,680,000000 to go!) to fund the wall. What I don't understand about these people (and everyone else who is supportive of taxpayer money going to the wall) is why they aren't upset that the President pulled one over on them? Like if someone offered to take me out to dinner and then left me with the check, I'd be pretty annoyed. Assuming a casual dinner for 2 amounts to $50, then you'd just have to scale up by 114,000,000 to match what President Trump is doing to the American people for his wall! 

     I know there are other perspectives to approach this from. Ethical, political, humanitarian, racial, whatever. But on a personal level, doesn't it bother you that the person you voted for and trust is taking you for a ride? Or maybe you're just not the type to, I don't know, have the self-respect to hold someone else accountable? Ah well, we just gotta deal for... 2 more years, maybe 6 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.